I've Found Him!!

Dear J,
Ahahaha...i've figured out MY kinda ideal guy...hehehe..i watched this Koreean movie..title was 'The Guy Was Cool He Was Gorgeous" ...U people out there shud watch itlaaaa...i mean its so so cool..d guy was not only cute..he fought awesomely..he had a big ego prob but was able to tolerate..definetly soft in d inside..n best part was..He wasn't fussy or choosy bout physical appearence.I mean d girl was cute n nice n all but just not dat hot~ kinda lookin kinda gurl u know!! N J..bout u-know-who..mm..i'v totally gotten over it..i juz dun dig playerz or wit dose involved in the i'm-not-so-sure relationships..haha...nevermind him..
I've been reading a few books recently..all which i haven't finished reading...skerat jalan je sume...dunno y..damnit laaa...its :- Gilead,She loves me not,Diary Of a Girl...n sumore yg i haven't started..
Owh...last weekend i went to T'ganu..i made up my mind last minute..supposedly i went to c Khai on Sunday...i owedy promised her but..puufff...i'm really bad in keeping my promise aren't i?? Well i'll make it up to her..i'allah..and yestday i was suppose to go to Alangs place to go Surau..dat promise was broken too..wit good reason tho..aaarrrgghh..wat kinda person m i??
XM's dat day was kinda awful + ok2 =i dun wanna know! Genetics n chem was a nightmare!! but i wanna put a lil' blame on my our sponsors n kolej which i dun wanna mention der respective names here!! Both are sooooo like beatin eachother up..i mean..lidah becabang..n dey dun think or say alike..makin us d victims of paranoia!! We were like worryin our freakin buts off juz thinkin bout the consequenses of their miscommunication!! This is our livesss..our future!! How dare dey play God wit us(i'm exagerattin but who d hell cares?!)...
Another thing dats botherin me is Kerul...i doubt he'll be reading dis tho so i'm not worried bout getting embarrassed..He's acting strange nowadays..Is he bored or tired bein frenz wit me or sumthin?? Coz he's ignorin n avoidin me now..is it juz me or wat i said is tru?? Even arif agrees wit me. Me n kerul go waaaaayy back..n i like him soo much n i really dun wanna ruin our frenship..dunno wat i'v dun wrong..can any1 answer me??
Derz only a few weeks left b4 finals..I gotta nail dis 1 dis time..Oh God...I haven't changed 1 bit but i wanna try u know...it'll kill me if i dun do dis rite..I gotta get outta dis place..get my scholar to India..Go do medcine..be a doc..get married..hev a fam..do my masters..open my clinic..go in2 admin like i've owez dreamed of..retire..live a happy n healthy life..so n so..Who doesn't want all dat?All we have to have is WiLL power.'Success isn't measured by the result, but by the effort',Mahatma Ghandi..'Winning isn't evrything..wanting it is!', Vince Lombardi
Later days~